Time Is Not On My Side
What do you call one hundred doctors at the bottom of the ocean? A good start!!
I know the joke is really aimed at lawyers but I'm not really pissed at any attorneys today. Doctors, on the otherhand...
It started last Friday when I had an appointment to see a specialist at University of Illinois-Chicago hospital. I'm usually prepared for these visits. I take a list of what my problems are. I bring reports and visuals. I'm a good patient, for the most part. I wasn't so good on Friday.
I really thought I was there for a precautionary visit. I did bring the reports and the discs for them to see. I didn't have any questions and when I heard the results that were totally unexpected, I pretty much froze. I left the office behaving like I was in a zombie movie (btw...I'll have more details tomorrow..TEASE!). But a lot of that was me being unprepared.
What happened next was on them. After a weekend of thought, I was in a better mood and had some questions about the next steps. I started to call them and realized neither of the two doctors gave me a business card. No phone number. No email address. Nada. Nothing. Zip.
I checked the hospital website. I found the department and even found the two doctors. Again no phone number. No email address. Nada. Nothing. Zip.
Next step is taking a return trip to UI-C for an in person visit. Surprisingly these doctors are there just once a week...and Monday wasn't that day. I asked for a phone number or email address. The receptionist left and a nurse returned. I asked the same questions and got nurse number two. When I asked her the same thing, she got another nurse. Finally this one took me into a room, explained a few things and what the procedures would be. I got my questions answered but I still don't have a phone number or email address for either doctor.
Time unnecessarily spent- 3 hours.
You may think ok...he spent 3 hours finding out some info he really needed. That's true but if that was all I wouldn't be writing this, would I?
Tuesday, I had another doctor's appointment. It was booked a month ago. Just a follow-up with my regular doctor. It was set for 1 pm. I was there right on time. The receptionist told me that the doctor was late. I asked how late? She asked if I could come back at 3 pm. Really? Are you kidding me? Apparently I'm a schlemiel because I said sure, see you in two hours. When I returned, I was told there were two ahead of me. I left that doctor's office at 4:30.
Total amount of wasted time in two days- 6 hours. SHIT!!!
That brings us up to today. I have a standing appointment with a mental health professional every Wednesday, at 3 pm. This professional, who I really like a lot, thought it would be a good idea for me to do some psych testing. I said sure, why not, and found a way to combine the two appointments consecutively. It's a long 4 hour day. Wears me out. Lots of talking.
Today at 2:30, I see a voice mail saying that she'll be a little late...maybe 15-20 minutes. Being the chump that I'm apparently becoming, I figure I can use the break to get some food and then come back for the appointment. I hit Walgreens. I get my orange Hostess Cupcake and it's off to clean out the cobwebs inside my head.
I'm in the waiting room. I look at the clock. It becomes 3:30. I'm reading. I again look at the clock. 3:45. I'm leaving at 4:00. She arrives at 3:55. She apologizes. I tell her not so nicely that she's the third medical person for mess with my time since Monday. She apologizes again. I said, fine. It's ok. We move on. She only wasted one hour of my time. Not bad compared to the others.
Total wasted time for the three days- 7 hours. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!
When did this behavior become ok? The answer is when I let them all off the hook. I understand that I need these people a lot more than they need me but that doesn't make it right. It's absolutely fucking unacceptable!! (btw...for me to use that word twice in a blog shows how pissed off I am.)
Will this happen again? Probably. Will my reactions be the same? Probably. What have I learned? That when I'm really upset at the medical community, I can blow off steam by writing an 800 word diatribe about unacceptable behavior. Other than that, really nothing.
So what do you call 200 doctors at the bottom of the ocean? I don't know but it makes me happy just thinking about it.